What’s not to love here? Subsisting on a steady diet of tea AND coffee myself, I can still see getting myself into this predicament.

I promise, once I swim back up to the top of my ocean of paperwork, I’ll finish my first post on Revenge of the Bridesmaids for my new Movie Marathon on Female Buddy Movies. I promise. Swimming as fast as I can ….

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I’m grading papers, so naturally all I want to do is anything other than grade papers.  But Christine O’Donnell’s new ad seems so analogous to the awful prose and twisted argumentation I’m reading from my undergrads that I couldn’t resist a study break.  “I’m not a witch,” she tells us.  “I’m you. … I’ll go to Washington and do what you’d do.”  Is it just me, or it this both absurd and brilliant?

“Saturday Night Live” did its best to mock the “witch” part of the ad — and rightly so, as this is easily the most mockable.  As truly weird as that is — indeed, I thought at first that by witch she meant the Barbara Bush-style euphemism for bitch, but I couldn’t imagine that anyone had called O’Donnell a bitch — what I’m really stuck on is the  “I’m you” comments.  I truly don’t know what to think.  Of course, I’m not from Delaware, but I’m fairly certain from everything I know about her that O’Donnell will most certainly not do what I would do if I could go to Washington.  The ad doesn’t tell us anything specific about what she’d do in Washington.  On the surface one might simply say that this is the most shamefaced, transparent political evasion ad in history.

But then there’s the ironed hair, the dark suit, the pearls, the adorably dimpled cheeks.  O’Donnell isn’t us — rather, she’s a Shirley Temple who’s grown up to do a very good job of appearing to possess gravitas.  She’s got just enough grade-school teacher in her to speak slowly and clearly, as if we’re eight years old.  But that’s not the worst political move in the current election cycle by a long shot.  She expresses a kind of gentle feminine affect custom-designed to seem less Mama Grizzly than like your earnest, well-intentioned best friend, or sister, or girlfriend.  She has no positions, only camera presence — and we can’t deny the presence.

Dumbest or smartest ad ever?  Let’s all remember the election that takes place in Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World and cry for our utter loss of reason in an overly media-savvy world.  We now have on our ballots the politicians we deserve.