More explanations: heaven, photographed
19 September 2011
There is a gateway to heaven, and Saint Peter stands before it directing traffic. He holds a microphone when it’s busy. Heaven is first come, first serve — but if you arrive with a large party it might take longer.
This is less well known: heaven is accessed via escalator. It is a surprisingly long escalator.
In heaven, good things come in threes.
Steam rises gloriously from stacks of things in threes. In heaven, all you do is point, and those steaming bundles of goodness are yours.
In heaven, the chili sauce inevitably makes a mess on the table, the tea gets really strong by the end, and you eat more than you intended. In fact, you weren’t sure you were capable of eating that much. But you are bolstered by the knowledge that heaven is not expensive, and it will be here waiting for you again next time.
There is no list of the elect, no exclusions, no prerequisites. Just look for Saint Peter and the escalator, and ascend.